Have you heard of The Five Love Languages? I’m in the middle of reading the book now and, with Valentine’s Day around the corner, I thought it would be fun to discuss: What’s your love language? Find out with a quick quiz below + see what mine is…and Fred Baby’s too!
Your love language tells you how you communicate love.
You can take the quiz here to find out your love language.
There are 5 Love Languages:
Words of Affirmation
Acts of Service
Receiving Gifts
Quality Time
Physical Touch
Fred Baby and I both took the quiz. And funnily enough, our results were pretty much exact opposites.
My love language results:
8 Receiving Gifts
8 Words of Affirmation
6 Acts of Service
4 Quality Time
4 Physical Touch
Fred Baby’s love language results:
10 Quality Time
8 Physical Touch
7 Acts of Service
3 Words of Affirmation
2 Receiving Gifts
At least our #3 was the same — Acts of Service, ha!
In some ways I was surprised. In terms of ways I would have thought Fred Baby received love, I would have guessed Words of Affirmation would be at or near the top. He seems to light up when I tell him how much I love and appreciate him. And as for showing love, I would have bet my life on his being Acts of Service because he is constantly selflessly doing things for me and others. Making dinner, snapping photos, the list goes on. Anything to make someone else’s life easier. But nope, that was right in the middle!
As for mine, I told him it comes with a disclaimer. Well, several disclaimers. First, as a whole, I think Receiving Gifts is the least important. I definitely appreciate (and would choose) having dinner cooked every night versus receiving a gift. That said, the thing that excited me the most when taking the quiz was the idea of a small gift.
I truly mean small gifts. Sometimes Fred Baby will come home with a People magazine for me and I think that’s the best thing ever. I really get excited about small things like that. One, I think they’re just fun and two, it shows the other person was thinking of you. I think the biggest appeal though is the element of surprise. I love a surprise! Funnily enough, my KayleeBug is just the same. Her favorite thing every Christmas is a surprise ball I get her. When I was little, I loved those surprise bags you could get at Claire’s at the mall. You know, pay $3 and see what’s inside.
Which isn’t to say he wasn’t thinking of me when he was grocery shopping and then making dinner (hello, that’s SO sweet) but something small like that lights me up. And while big gifts have definitely been appreciated over the years (like a dream closet, a new car, a trip to Hawaii), I really get jazzed about something small like a magazine just as much. Weird, I know. He says he really could have saved a lot of money!
Anyway, so now I joke with him and say Bring me a present! when he leaves the house, and also tell him to tell me why he loves me (Words of Affirmation). To be clear, I am joking. Tell me I’m great and buy me things!
His, of course, demonstrate what we already knew: He’s a far better person than I am. He basically wants to go on a walk and hold hands. Aaaw.
I will say it’s something I’ve definitely kept in mind. I’m rarely one to clean up on my own, for instance. So when I do, I always assumed he was going to be really happy about it. He could care less. That’s not his love language. In fact, he’d rather me not do that and save my energy for spending quality time together. Or, on his birthday and Christmas, he hates when I spend hours wrapping presents when we could have instead spent that time together hanging out.
So, I think The 5 Love Languages are helpful, even if the book itself isn’t necessarily my favorite. Have you read it?
Take the quiz here to discover your love language and let me know your results in the comments or over on my last Instagram!
I’d love to know…
Photo by Bob Willoughby of Audrey Hepburn during Two for the Road
You may also like: Valentine’s Day Gift Guide, Enneagram Personality Test, Myers-Briggs Personality Test and What’s Your Feng Shui Element?
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Unsurprisingly, I’m a words of affirmation girl! I also rank somewhat evenly with touch, acts of service and QT. Gifts are always appreciated, but lower on my scale.
I have found the love languages to be helpful in non-romantic relationships too 🙂