Gluten, You Ignorant Slut

Why This ISN'T FUNNY #celiac #celiacdisease #glutenfree

Well, today I had a much more light-hearted blog post planned (all about my favorite pool floats!) but then I saw this over on Elle’s Instagram and became so enraged I had to vent (and reading through many of the comments I’m not alone).

I will preface this by saying I’m sure the person who created it and posted it meant no harm (but that caption, “We all have that friend . . . ” is the WORST), so here’s why I still feel like slapping said person(s). Just kidding, violence is never the answer, but a virtual bitch slap? Feels so good. thought this was a good opportunity to open up the dialogue.

Listen, I get it. So many people are “gluten-free” as a fad diet. But then there are the rest of us. Those who struggle with feeling like we are isolated and live in a bubble – not by choice — but because something as stupid as gluten, the protein found in wheat and barley, as well as hidden in TONS of foods you would never suspect, literally decimates our insides, poisons our bodies and brains, making it impossible to absorb nutrients, which not only causes major digestive distress, but neurological problems. Not to mention feeling sad AF sometimes not only emotionally because it’s an effing challenge to figure out what to eat, but feeling like we live in our own bubble because we literally can’t eat out AT ALL due to cross-contamination issues (it only takes 1/8 of a teaspoon of gluten to set off a reaction). Oh and because over 90% of serotonin is found in the gut, and that gut is now one leaky gut, which means often we have depression and anxiety on top of it.



It’s the same as making fun of anyone with any auto-immune disease or any disease period. Would you make fun of a diabetic person who can’t eat a cupcake? Or someone with a peanut allergy who will go into anaphylactic shock and die if they eat peanut butter?


My name is no.

My sign is no.

My number is no.

You need to let it go.

But something about our culture here in America permits this. I say in America because other countries like Italy, France and Australia are lightyears ahead of the curve in understanding and diagnosing Celiac disease and gluten intolerance, and restaurant employees are trained in how to deal with it. In those countries, diagnosis happens in under one year. Here in the US? It takes 10+ years to get a proper diagnosis. That’s TEN YEARS of needless suffering, harm to your body, and being told you’re crazy. Or in my case, 20 years. TWENTY YEARS.

The struggle is real. And the bubble is real. Trust me, I feel it all the time.

I feel it when I walk through a grocery store, starving yet again, staring aimlessly trying to figure out what I can eat. I’m hungry right now for the record.

I feel it when I’m invited to a friend’s house for dinner and the only way I can say yes and safely not get sick is if I bring my own meal.

I feel it when I’m invited to a blogger lunch with someone I admire and have to choose between risking not eating anything at all and being whispered about as someone with an eating disorder (again, nothing to be gossiped about), or coming across as high-maintenance because I have to explain to the waiter repeatedly that I need the salad completely dry, no dressing, no spices, and that I have Celiac disease which means I can’t eat wheat (or dairy or corn – yup)  and then hope and pray he understands and listens, only to then be delivered a salad that visibly has something on it, and when I confirm again and he swears no, no, no nothing is on it, only to then take a bite and immediately taste vinegar, vinegar that if it is made from apple cider is fine, but if it’s made from grain will literally keep me in bed for THREE WEEKS (turns out the tomatoes were marinated in something).

So, do I think this is funny?


Okay, rant over.

I’ve been meaning to share more about this for, well, ever, so I guess there’s no time like the present.

Are you Celiac or gluten-intolerant? Know someone who is? Give them a hug, okay?

p.s. If you think you may have Celiac disease or gluten-intolerance, and if like me you have Hashimoto’s or thyroid problems or any auto-immune disease for that matter which also means you can not eat gluten, this blog post may help. I also highly recommend the book Jennifer’s Way by actress and Celiac-sufferer Jennifer Esposito (or this video) for anyone with any of the aforementioned and to anyone who loves anyone with the aforementioned.

p.p.s. Read this.

p.p.p.s. Next up, those pool floats…

Update: As of May 25th, Elle removed the comic from their Instagram feed. I’ve yet to see an apology posted anywhere, other than by the creator of the comic itself which was only in the comments of that post, which is appreciated. But Elle, what the hell?

Keep in touch!


20+ Best Pool Floats for Summer 2016 #IHaveThisThingWithPoolFloats
Off-the-Shoulder Dresses & Tops You'll Live In All Summer

13 thoughts on “Gluten, You Ignorant Slut

  1. Dianah gruenke

    Thank you. Thank you and thank you. Finding you months ago and realizing I’m not alone brought me to tears. The depression is Real. The anxiety is Real, and my husband is a real gem for putting up with me.

    1. Kelly Post author

      Aw, props to you for staying strong and to your hubby for being such a great support. I seriously do not know where I would be without mine — he’s been an absolute lifesaver.

      If you have any questions at all, feel free to contact me and know that you are not alone. All of the comments on my Instagram and on Elle’s are huge proof of that. Now it’s up to us to get the word out even more and to take gentle care of ourselves. Wishing you well!

  2. Alexia

    I was diagnosed with gluten intolerance when I was a little girl. Luckily, my intolerance has subsided (I didn’t eat gluten for my entire childhood which seemed to “clean” my gut). Anyways, when my mum told my MD that I had gluten intolerance she didn’t believe my mum. Surprising how an MD hasn’t heard of anything like that, although this was years ago.
    Best wishes to you!

    1. Kelly Post author

      WOW, awesome of your mom! It’s so hard now to be taken seriously for some reason when it comes to gluten issues, I can only imagine what it was like years ago. Great that you were able to prevent so many years of needless suffering. Hoping to do the same with my niece. Thanks so much for your comment!

  3. Hannah @ The Homesteady

    THANK YOU!!! I’ve been gluten-free for four years after being diagnosed with gluten intolerance. I **hate** it when people you’ve just met press you. “But what happens if you eat gluten?” Oh sure, let me tell you all about my diarrhea.

    1. Kelly Post author

      Seriously, right!? It’s one thing if people are asking from a genuine, interested place of understanding. It’s another when the questions are accusatory like “Oh yeah right, like what’s gonna happen?”

      Also, it is — or can become — so much more than just the digestive maladies which are already debilitating enough. Depression, anxiety, flu-like symptoms that keep you in bed for several days, if not weeks, facial numbness and tingling, dizziness, vision problems, it’s a blast! 😉

  4. Suena

    Wait? Someone who’s had hashimoto and thyroid disease can’t eat gluten? No wonder. I wonder why this was never mentioned before??

    1. Kelly Post author

      That’s exactly how I felt when I first learned this a year ago, after having been diagnosed with Hashimoto’s for over 10 years! No doctor EVER told me that. And I was continually going to the doctors with all sorts of symtoms that seemed randomly disconnected at the time, feeling like I was going crazy and/or dying.

      This post gives more insight:

      Do let me know if you have any Qs — happy to help if I can!

      1. Lynne menegaux

        Happened upon this article while looking at your pool floats (pineapple) as I lay in bed waiting to go to doctors for stomach issues after indulging on vacation. Your story seems like you wrote it about me. Thank you very insightful. All the same symptoms right down to vertigo. I can’t tell you how you may have just changed my health life. Thank you

  5. Erin

    Have you tried Zoloft or Remeron? I’ve watched dozens of people have dramatic improvements from the symptoms you’ve described by taking those meds. We have more seretonin receptors in our guts than in our brains, and thus the SSRIs can do wonders. Many initially stay away from them as they think of them as mental health meds and think we are saying “your problems are mental, not physical”–but they are all interconnected. Zoloft has a short half life; it’s easy to try for 12 weeks and then stop if it’s not for you. Most are also able to widen their diet with these meds. And SO much more energy.


Leave a Reply

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.